Tag Archives: pregnancy

Pregnancy After Loss Is…

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I’m approximately halfway through my 5th pregnancy and hope that it will be my 3rd healthy live birth. Having suffered two losses before, I’m quite familiar with pregnancy after loss and the many complicated emotions that accompany it.

I’ve become more entrenched in the pregnancy loss community since losing my 3rd son in the second trimester following a poor prenatal diagnosis a year ago. This community has shown me that I’m far from alone despite the often secretive nature of pregnancy loss. If you want to hear more about my losses and medical complications feel free to read one of my three articles:

Glimmers of Joy Amid Grief, Loss and Loneliness

My Emergency C-section Recovery

Trauma Recovery and Mental Health Support for Mothers

…or watch a more detailed video version of this post: 

My desire in sharing the many aspects of pregnancy after loss (below) is twofold: 1) Help women during pregnancy after loss to see that they aren’t alone in their feelings and experience, and 2) Educate people who have never walked this path or who are trying to understand what a friend or loved one might be going through in the face of loss or pregnancy following loss.

WARNING: The following content is triggering. If you find yourself in a vulnerable place and aren’t sure if you’re ready to dive into tough emotions and realities then please save this article or the video on Instagram to watch later. That said, if you need a good cry, to feel less alone, or to better understand this difficult road then please read on…

Pregnancy After Loss Is…

Pregnancy after loss is…feeling fear and joy at the same time

Pregnancy after loss is…numbing yourself to all emotions because they feel too big

Pregnancy after loss is…having a hard time letting yourself relax and be happy

Pregnancy after loss is…holding your breath every time you use the bathroom because you’re worried you will see blood in the toilet or when you wipe

Pregnancy after loss is…feeling like you will finally be at peace when you reach a certain milestone or scan only to find that the relief from good news is fleeting, and the fear rears its ugly head once again before you’ve even left the parking lot

Pregnancy after loss is…thinking about the baby you lost just as much if not more than the baby in your womb

Pregnancy after loss is…wondering if you’ll start telling people you are expecting only to have to tell them you’re not

Pregnancy after loss is…wondering if this time you will get to hold your child and plan for their future

Pregnancy after loss is…knowing all too well that a positive pregnancy test doesn’t guarantee a baby

Pregnancy after loss is…grieving the child you lost every step of the way

Pregnancy after loss is…feeling alone

Pregnancy after loss is…holding onto misplaced guilt, shame and self-doubt

Pregnancy after loss is…seeing other women who are pregnant too and feeling a stab of jealousy because you think their experience must be easier than yours

Pregnancy after loss is…seeing women with multiple children or closely spaced pregnancies and feeling overwhelming grief

Pregnancy after loss is…wondering if you will ever have a child of your own

Pregnancy after loss is…wondering if this will be your last pregnancy and it will end poorly

Pregnancy after loss is…wondering if you have the strength to go through it all again

Pregnancy after loss is…having the most incredible courage because you’re willingly going through something that feels terrifying and putting yourself back into a narrative familiar with trauma and loss

Pregnancy after loss is…knowing way more about what can go wrong than you ever wanted to

Pregnancy after loss is…being scared of a poor prenatal diagnosis

Pregnancy after loss is…feeling that others don’t understand you

Pregnancy after loss is…worrying that your next ultrasound will show that the baby’s heart has stopped beating or that they aren’t growing as expected

Pregnancy after loss is…fearing that you will be faced with an unthinkable choice to end your pregnancy in order to save your baby from suffering

Pregnancy after loss is…feeling judged for things that are out of your control

Pregnancy after loss is…connecting with women who have walked the same path and share their stories in secret, out of sight from a world that simply doesn’t understand

Pregnancy after loss is…former milestones, due dates and anniversaries that bring some measure of sadness and reflection both during the pregnancy and for years to come

Pregnancy after loss is…filled with hypervigilance, constantly scanning for what might go wrong

Pregnancy after loss is…nervously counting kicks and fearing stillbirth

Pregnancy after loss is…being told “at least you know the baby wasn’t going to be healthy”

Pregnancy after loss is…being told “at least you already have children”

Pregnancy after loss is…being told “at least it happened early in the pregnancy”

Pregnancy after loss is…being told “everything happens for a reason”

Pregnancy after loss is…being told “God just wanted another angel in heaven”

Pregnancy after loss is…being told “time will heal all pain”

Pregnancy after loss is…understanding the grim but powerful reality that women’s bodies are capable of delivering both life and death

Pregnancy after loss is…wanting to celebrate with loved ones while feeling guilty for times when it was hard being happy for friends who were expecting during or after your loss

Pregnancy after loss is…experiencing emotional, physical and spiritual exhaustion

Pregnancy after loss is…reliving flashbacks of traumatic moments from your loss

Pregnancy after loss is…wondering if you will get to the second trimester or even over halfway through your pregnancy only to experience loss, decisions on how to deliver your baby, and an empty womb that looks as though it should still be carrying life inside it

Pregnancy after loss is…realizing how little people understand how to care for others in grief

Pregnancy after loss is…worrying about a crash-landing during labor and delivery or a C-section

Pregnancy after loss is…feeling guilty when you stop thinking about the baby you lost

Pregnancy after loss is…feeling like you don’t deserve to feel the happiness that’s building for the child you’re expecting

Pregnancy after loss is…full of hope and love unlike you’ve ever experienced

Pregnancy after loss is…different for every woman

You’re not alone. Resources and people exist who can support you with your wellness during this pregnancy. Please don’t hesitate to reach out to me directly to ask questions, get referrals, or share your story in private. Sending you big hugs and compassion.

Yours in health and wellness,

Maggie

10 Ways to Make Pregnancy Physically Easier (Part 2)

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Life has a really funny, not-so-funny way of putting you in your place, doesn’t it? In the first half of this two-part pregnancy article, I expressed pride about my pregnancies being relatively pain-free. Well, life thought that was just hysterical enough to knock me off my feet. I’ve spent the last couple weeks miserably sick and aching every which way. Just a personal reminder not to make anyone out there think for a second that I don’t go through challenges too (because I do…and if a toddler with a 5-day fever on breathing treatments coupled with a mama violently throwing up isn’t convincing enough, I don’t know what is.)

Nonetheless, I stick by what I said: There are plenty of comfort and health measures women can take to help the pregnancy journey feel a little less bumpy. Minus the one large and necessary bump, of course.

For Part One of this article Read Here.

For the next five pregnancy-related suggestions, read on…

 

 

6) Posture Support and Chest Stretches

As both belly and bosom get bigger, a woman’s center of gravity changes. Pregnant women often find themselves slouching and feeling “off” when these body changes take off, typically in the second trimester. It’s important to correct and support poor posture, especially since it will continue to be challenged once baby arrives from around-the-clock feeding and snuggling. Proper posture and strong back muscles help alleviate neck and back discomfort, and chest tightness.

Prenatal back exercises are best done on weight machines or with light-to-moderate free weights and resistance bands. Helpful exercises include the following: Reverse Flies, Rotator Cuff, Lat Pull Downs, Rows and Modified Back Extensions. Chest stretches with the arms behind the back or in a door jamb are also extremely effective at helping keep the front of the body open and comfortable.

 

7) Prenatal Probiotics & Antioxidants

Microbiome. It’s one of the 5 Health Buzzwords in 2018 that I blogged about at the start of the year. And so here we are again, revisiting what this word means for expectant mothers…

Our body is made of more bacteria than cells. Bacteria outnumber cells by 10 to 1! Not only is this large colony of bacteria (aka the microbiome) the foundation of mom’s immune system but it also largely influences the developing immune system in the baby. For a long time it was thought that the baby got exposed to its first bacteria as it passed through the vaginal canal and then again through skin contact and breastfeeding, but now scientists know that mom’s bacteria migrates to the placenta to support the fetus before birth. (And most of this bacteria has made its way there from mom’s mouth!!!)

Mom’s diet and gut health can affect her immune function during pregnancy making the ride easier vs. harder. But equally important is how a woman’s diet affects her baby’s gut health. So, expectant mamas – consider investing in a monthly prenatal probiotic that has both probiotics and prebiotics (my favorite: Garden of Life Prenatal) and eating a diet rich in antioxidants (ex: berries, sweet potatoes, pecans, black beans, apples, spinach, kale and more). You may have an easier time fending off pesky colds and runny noses that plague prenatal life. You may also reduce your risk of preterm birth and boost the odds that your baby has a happy tummy (there are babies who are happy tooters and fussy tooters…trust me, you will want the former…I’ve had the latter).

 

 

8) Sleep Quantity and Quality

Sleep is even more important when pregnant and can make or break the rest of mom’s day. Both long nights of sleep and quality rest are crucial for helping mama feel her best. Alas, pregnancy has a cruel way of trying to wreck both as moms toss and turn due to changing hormones, aches from all the stretching, and/or racing minds.

One thing you can do to support your sleep (literally) is use pillows. I’m not a raging fan of the traditional, long pregnancy pillows for a couple reasons – they run the length of mom’s body and cover her tummy, increasing her core temperature and potentially making sleep more difficult. Also, the length of the pillows makes it tempting for some moms to sleep with their hips askew, throwing one leg farther in front of the other, which can cause a lot of back and hip discomfort. My personal preference and recommendation for prenatal clients is to simply use one or two regular pillows and save the cash on an expensive pregnancy pillow for a spa day or something. One pillow can be used between the legs for hip support in a side-lying position – be sure to keep legs on top of one another for relief and comfort. The other pillow can be used on nights when your upper back is aching or chest is feeling tight. Simply hug it under the top arm while you lie on your side to offer support for the shoulders and upper back.

 

9) Braving the Neti Pot

So many people are timid about using the neti pot and okay, it can feel weird at first. Sending salt water up your nose isn’t exactly the most exciting concept. I get it. But during pregnancy women are prone to congestion that can drag down their energy and/or spiral into a sinus infection. Stay comfortable by using this time-tested nasal cleanse to keep breathing easy and clear. It may also help you avoid having to turn to pharmaceutical drugs for congestion and antibiotic use for an infection that won’t clear on its own. All good things.

 

 

10) Adjusting Footwear

It’s not a surprise that all the changes in hormones can result in growing feet too! If mom doesn’t recognize the need for new footwear during pregnancy, a number of discomforts can arise (and they don’t have to!). Avoiding high heels most of the time, if not all the time, is a good start. But you may notice the need for a half or full size larger in tennis shoes. This is one area where you shouldn’t draw your purse strings tight. Go ahead and invest in the bigger shoes – there’s a strong chance your feet are staying larger after pregnancy. Having the right, comfortable footwear impacts how every other joint in your body functions during both exercise and normal everyday movements. It’s critical to treat your feet to some TLC since they’re what you use to get around the world!

 

Here’s to happy and healthy mamas!!

Yours in health and wellness,

Maggie

 

Pregnancy and Exercise – Infographic

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As WellnessWinz readers know, I’m a big fan of exercising while pregnant and wrote on the subject already: The Inside Scoop on Exercise During Pregnancy. Today, I’m thrilled that my friends from the UK’s MyFitnessBoutique have weighed in on the topic with the following article and infographic contribution. Thanks, guys!!! Gals – get your exercise on whether pregnant or not!

Pregnancy & Exercise 

For women who enjoy being active but are also expecting a child, exercising becomes a dilemma. Do they try and remain active for their own benefit and wellbeing, or is exercise a bad idea while pregnant?

This infographic from My Fitness Boutique (www.myfitnessboutique.co.uk) shows that pregnant women can still obtain regular exercise without doing any harm. In fact, it is rather important for pregnant women to try and get at least 30 minutes exercise a day for a minimum of five days a week. Exercises such as Pilates, squats, wall push-ups, cycling and lunges all serve to improve the stamina of women during pregnancy, making pains less difficult to bear. It also helps them sleep better at night and provides a self-esteem boost.

If you’re expecting a baby and you still want to keep active, that’s magnificent – just remember not to overdo it. All exercises should be done with caution and if you feel any strain or discomfort, stop the exercise. Even something as simple as a 30-minute walk still counts as exercise and certainly beats doing nothing. Don’t believe that if you haven’t exercised before, now is not the time to start. Do what you can and you will thank yourself for it.

Pregnancy Fitness

Yours in health and wellness,

Maggie

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